Published on 05/23/2008

The third step to mercy is to act as though it is already a reality in our hearts. Don't feel yourself into a new way of acting--act yourself into a new way of feeling. Step out by faith.

Take a moment to look at the crook of your elbow. According to today's New York Times, you're viewing one million bacteria living in every square centimeter. There's your devotional thought for the day. The bacteria in and on your body outnumber you 10 to 1. But the good news is that you need them as much as they need you. For instance, those friends living on your elbow help to moisturize your skin. You probably haven't thanked them lately.

God redeems all he allows, physically and spiritually. We're discovering the true happiness Jesus offers, focusing on his Beatitudes and their significance today. This week we've explored his promise, "Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy" (Matthew 5:7). We've learned that mercy is forgiveness, choosing to pardon. How do we pardon those who have injured us?

Yesterday we admitted the reality of our hurt, and asked God to give us his forgiveness and grace. The third step to mercy is to act as though it is already a reality in our hearts. Don't feel yourself into a new way of acting--act yourself into a new way of feeling. Step out by faith. Every time the pain wells up inside your heart again, tell yourself again that you have released this person from the prison of his or her sin. That the ink on the pardon is dry, the deed is done, the forgiveness made.

This means you will initiate restoration. With God's help, act in courage. Tell the person honestly what he did to you, and how much this pain has hurt you. He may not even know his injustice, or comprehend its severity. If I hurt you, I want to know it. I want you to talk to me, not about me. Go to the person in question, with honesty.

Tell this person that you have pardoned her. She may not understand what you mean, or believe it, or accept it. She may never reciprocate what you have done. This is not yours to decide. You must begin the process of healing the relationship, whatever your partner in restoration decides to do.

And find an honest way to a new relationship. To forgive is not to be naïve. It is not to allow an unrepentant, unchanged person to hurt you yet again. Neither is it to assume that he will never change. Seek a balance with the wisdom God gives to know what and where you can trust. You may never have the old relationship, but you can have a new one by the mercy of God. Your Father is waiting to redeem your pain for his glory and your good, but the initiative lies with you. Where will you start today?